No Money No Honey - Adventures in Marrakesh
Day 1 in Marrakech, day 1 filled with a lot of walking through souks and avec some friendly assistance we successfully made our way around a sizeable amount of the medina (old city). Moroccan people are generally friendly from what we experienced today, everybody is happy to help you, as you walk through the souks "bonjour madamoiselles" from everyone's lips as well as "chocolat" (en francais, imagine the accent) "where you from? America? Senegal?" At the time of writing this I am not certain of Senegal's location in relation to morocco neither am I certain of the relationship between senegalese and moroccans, dare I make an assumption - it may be something to do with Senegal being the closest Francophone country with black people or as someone pointed out to us on our first night here there are other Africans in morocco en route to spain (which is en route to France, en route to UK, en route to perceived opportunities and better living) - speaking of the first night, I will take you back to our first official night in morocco;
SM, WT and XC land in Morocco 7pm local time...First impressions from the airport "This IS Africa" second impressions from the airport toilet (lacking tissue paper in SM's cubicle - even though I found some, the recycled kind in mine) ok so second impressions from the airport toilet "This IS AFRICA.". The queue is going nowhere slowly, the people are walking around with that familiar air of bureacratic power, one man comes up to me as I queue to be cleared asking to see my passport and then flipping through my green mamba (Zimbabwean passport) before he asks "vous avez un visa?" I quickly show him (even though its already been checked once before - before I was admitted into the queues foR clearance) and I realise I'm too nervous to speak French, it is a universally rapid language and the processing of what to say in response can make one feel redundant when the french words don't linger on your lips instantaneously. After changing queues we get seen by an immigration officer, who is quite friendly (not too bad on the eyes either). Third impressions of Maroc - the baggage collection area "This is beautiful.". Changing money at the airport was no hassle and we had a driver pick us up to take us to our Riad. The Riad Al Jazira is situated in the old medina, thus making it hard for cars to get throiugh the narrow streets; we were dropped off by the driver at Sidi Ben Silimane (when people say it, it sounds like they're saying silimane silimane :p) from Sidi Ben Silimane its a short walk to the Riad. When we first walked to the Riad, it did feel a lot longer and a bit of trepidation did settle in me as we were led through the zigzagging walls of the medina, however the fascination of the old town superseded any fear. The Riad on first impression was absolutely amazing, with an authentic Moroccon zest to it.
Our first eating experience was at Dar ** recommended by the Riad we were staying in, the restaurant owner/manager? Enlightened us with his lifestory of how he had stayed in Washington DC and his opinions on people from other African countries sans Ethiopia (which he said Ethiopians think they're not African, all I could think of was Pot. Kettle. Black). Anyway SM stepped up to the throne and was crowned Princess, as wife to Hyshan *sp* which is one unusual union where the wife does not want her husband to have her number, the universal language of "I don't want you to call me" was totally lost in translation...
Hyshan:Give me your number we go to Club Pacha together
Us: We don't know our number
Hyshan: Ok just send me a text
Us: we don't have credit, roaming charges *mumble mumble* #side eyes
So we left Dar ** as 2 ladies and Princess SM.
We were lucky on our first day to be able to meet Laurence, a lovely French lady who knows Marrakech very well, after breakfast we met up to go and visit the old city, see the souks, market and the all important Jema el Fna *sp* square. As is the norm ( I say this after 1 week in Marrakech) walking through the medina we were greeted by the usual "bonjour gazelles" - it does sound quite enticing, and of course the eager to exercise their English (which was quite cute) "where you from?" "England?" "Obama?" "Senegal?" Lol and the ever ubiquitos "chocolat"... We made a stop in the spice market to have some drink de l'eau ( or ema en arabic) and we had our first taste of handling sales people trying to do your mendi, play music for you, without you asking and then expecting you to pay *taught by our street wise guide* laurence we learnt that as anyone approaches, just look away and say a firm "No" - sounds a lot easier than it actually is, trust me. The first flamboyant tradesman I can remember encountering is the tradesman from the spice market who sat us down in his shop (which had chameleons just chilling on top of a necklace rack thing) and assured us (Princess SM especially) that there are no snakes, "don't worry", "relaxxx" and he enlightened us with the many fragrances (amber, musk) and spices morocco has to offer. Eventually we ended up at the square and parted ways with Laurence, having learnt the skill of saying "no" before it was too late, also learning a favourite saying of Marrakechis is "no money no honey" and having learnt that when people called out "chocolat" to us we should respond with "chocolat blanc"...
So deeper we delved into the souks and then we came across a young guy who was telling us the way we were going had nothing to see ("its closed" a lot of people seem to say something is "closed" when it isn't *shrugs* it seems to mean there's nothing to see there). He then gave us directions to the Jewish Quarters which was having an auction (which doesn't seem to necessarily mean ebay highest bidder wins type auction, I think an auction may just mean its for bulk buying) for 1 day only, because the Berber tradesman are nomads, they are only present in the city on a Monday. He then assured us he was no guide and his accompaniment to the location was for free, he introduced us to his brother (who spoke very good English and I suppose he was the official spokesperson) and we keep referring to him as the "feel my skin" guy. So he showed us around the market and explained the history behind all the shops and all the goods they sold and how to use them. We sat in a small shop and he offered us mint tea (as they do en Maroc) and we spoke for some time. Maybe there was something in the tea? Maybe he was just so gorgeous (most Moroccans are, esp the Berber ones) or it may have been his non-aggressive sales approach that drew us in to wanting to make purchases. He demonstrated on SM's face how to use clay + rose water as a facial mask and we felt the difference - was remarkable. Asked him if that was what he used on his skin because he had very nice skin and he was like "Oh yes I use the clay and rose, feel my skin" then he leaned toward us and was taking our fingers to feel his skin "its nice isn't it?" Lol - from "feel my skin" guy we learnt how to say thank you in Arabic and that's said as "shukran" *sp* we also learnt that some men when posing for pictures (everyone wants to pose for a picture with you) some men were taking opportunities to cop a feel...hmmm
So next, right round the corner from the Jewish quarters was Palais de Bahia, we left the palace to the museum, got lost along the way (the old city map = confused.com) asked for directions, got accompanied there - were asked for money then we refused :p *note to self, always remember that sometimes help is appreciated through payment :-o no amount of smiles and/or giggles sufficed; we left the museum with ambitions to walk back home to al jazira and so were asking along the way for directions to sidi ben silimane...seeing as it was day 1 we must have looked painfully lost and confused because as we left the souks on our way home people would stop and tell us "the square is that way" pointing in the opposite direction of where we were walking then we pissed off a little kid *shrugs* and he swore at us, then we got to a part of town where we were even more sorely lost but apparently very close by to al jazira, a boy offered to help but when we told him we couldn't pay he said ah well its a left then a lot of zigzagging through houses... So we went left, young boys said "its closed" #eyeroll then our 'friend' mustve felt bad and came to show us the way, but his sidekick then wanted a piece of some action and his sidekicks' sidekicks too so a full entourage of pple showed us to our riad, then sidekick number 1 was like "oh we need some money" we already told "friend" we have no money, SM coughed up 10 dirham, sidekicks were not impressed and proceeded to lift up WT's skirt, the Riad pple came to our rescue as they must hav e heard the hustle and bustle outside the door and they chased away the infidels.
So feeling a bit low spirited we made our way out anticipating entertainment and dinner in tthe square, we did get good dinner and we met denzel (second name washington) no really we met assaqat (can't really remember his proper name but we have it written down somewhere) anyway he's a poet and he was especially enamoured by SM to which he said "oooo its Nicki Minaj" *cue in "its Pink Friday Hoe* toh bad it was a tuesday, then another waiter decided to call SM Serena Williams, thus making this particular food stall "our usual dining spot" - 117 takes you to Heaven...where they say goodbye saying "see ya wouldn't wanna be ya" or "see you later, alligator"
Sent from Heaven we went back to Al Jazira via the ice cream stall via some guy exercising the usual Marrakech rhyme
Random guy: come in and eat, finger lickin good, sainsburys
Us: Non merci
Guy reaches out to take WT by the arm;
XC: Please don't touch her
Random Guy: you don't want me to touch her are you saying she's a minger
We keep walking away;
Random Guy: Primark underwear everywhere
Home sweet home thus ended the night, 2 ladies and Nicki Minaj aka the 3 Lala Fatimas, after a song our landlord at the Riad Khalid taught us how to sing, so from Khalid we learnt to sing the tune + the English words of Lala Fatima... Lala meaning lady :)
Day 2 - Ourika Valley!!!!
Shoes on for some valley walking, excursion day we set out at 9 30 with Mohammed (the driver who picked us up from the airport) to the Atlas Mountains...along the way we stopped to take some pics, huge contrast between Marrakech and the Valley, the valley is much more serene and peaceful. We were as usual accosted by the photo gropers, "cous cous" man (they say cous cous in place of cheese) and Princess SM aka lala fatima aka Nicki Minaj aka Serena Williams was propositioned once again and we had to demand the number of camels needed for her to remain as a wife :p.
As usual we made a shopping stop :p this time at a ladies run cooperative for Argan oil, our hostess was lovely and single (just to put that out there, young, fierce, independent business lady lol) anyway she taught us when drinking mint tea (we had a diff herb tea this time) you clink the glasses together (and say chin chin but I can't remember who taught us that much) and then you say "Basaha Waraha" which means "wish each other to be in good health" *something along those lines...
We eventually reached the point of the mountains where only people on foot or donkeys can continue, our guide Syed (Bless Him) proved the saying "don't judge a book by its' cover" because with his scrawny frame he managed to lift us up rocks (all of us) up to close to 2000m, we reached the fourth waterfall of the seven waterfalls that cascade into each other from the mountains and stream into the ourika valley settlement, the irrigation system is quite fascinating and impressive as was the Berber refridgerator which uses mini waterfalls to keep drinks cool, what also impressed me was the bright orange fanta :p
Syed taught us more of the language, "zigis" *sp* is let's go in berber and "yah-leh" is let's go in arabic, "ola" is coca cola, and there's a point in the moutain where there is an echo and if you say "Ola" someone in spain will reply #side eye but yeah there is an echo.
Peace.Love yada yada etc lol
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